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“The final third went on to continue their amazing relationship. Some of the women who were devastated when they found out would think to themselves, ‘I have to weigh that against the fact that he’s been the most sensitive, loving, and caring partner and father.
And he’s been great in bed.’ Suddenly, they had to ask themselves if it’s worth giving up this amazing man simply because he has desires and wants to have relationships with other men.
Additionally, the men were far more aware of sexual diversity and desire, so these men were more willing to engage in less heteronormative sexual acts, such as liking anal penetration by their women partners. Many women found themselves exploring BDSM, polyamory, and were themselves encouraged to explore same-sex relationships.
In one case, a bisexual man made it clear he would be seeing other men but banned her from dating anyone else and confined her to their home to take care of their children. That’s what contributed to an unhealthy relationship,” she says.
Some couples found that while their relationship was stable, that they struggled to find acceptance in others.
They also were less likely to value unequal and traditional gender roles, according to Dr Maria Pallotta-Chiarolli, Senior Lecturer in Social Diversity in Health and Education at Deakin University and the co-author of the book .
“Because of this, these men were far more sensitive and desired to establish an equitable relationship. They were keen fathers and wanted to set up equitable gender relationships in the home.
Society, the media, counselling services, and schools tend to 'erase' their relationships by grouping bisexuality within the gay or straight binary; or forget altogether that bisexual men and their partners are of all ages, ethnicities, countries, classes, she explains.
She adds: “In most films, bisexual men have either been killed, suicided, or been killers. Very few films, and only recently has film begun to explore polyamory and bisexuality, and women in relationships with bisexual men, in a more positive and varied light." However, it would be a mistake to paint relationships between bisexual men and women as black and white utopias.
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Research has found that men who are bisexual - and feel comfortable being out - are better in bed - and the relationship develops - more caring long-term partners and fathers.
Some women who took part in an Australian study even said they would never be able to go back to dating straight men at all.
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